of being a new grad.
Sunday, June 12th.
The day I graduated from university; the last time I stepped foot on a school's campus and called it "home." Something I will never do again.
I am now three days out, and I feel empty. Like I haven't processed it, or maybe I really didn't have anything to hold me. People keep asking me, "How does it feel?" and "Are you happy?" I truly don't know what to tell them.
I feel sad. I feel numb. I feel blissed out. I am all of these things at once and not at all. It hasn't hit me that I will never be able to drive over to a fraternity house just to hang out. I will never be able to do midnight food runs with these people who have surrounded me for the past four years. That I will never have to deal with those who made my life a living hell ever again.
I am...changed.
But something has been instilled in me by my university, by the incredible faculty that I have been so lucky to call my mentors. A love for words and for writing and for critical thinking and for exhaustive discussion. I never treated college as my sole place of learning and, if we're being honest, I should have focused more on my studies. I was more focused on the social aspects.
Or so I thought until now.
It has rubbed off on me. I have learned. I have a real passion for literature that has been encouraged and nurtured by those who share the same. I have made companions for life within the pages of novels written by the dead and acquaintances with the new. I know I will never stop learning if I never stop reading. I am connected with all those who I may never see again, my classmates and professors, through books.
I am sad. I am numb. I am blissed. I am changed. And most importantly, I am educated.
I am educated, empowered, and excited. I am a woman grown, ready to take on the world.
That is what I feel, now.
This is my life as a new grad.